Danny Partridge, Private Eye
by bookwormillau
Summary: After a hilarious chain of events, a suspicious Danny comes to the conclusion that his mother's new boyfriend is a murderer. Determined to find the truth, will Danny save his family before it's too late or will he instead wreck his mother's relationship?
1. Sick or Lovesick?

DISCLAIMER: I don't own any of it.

Note: Please read and review this story. I know that reviewing is a pain, but I really want to become a great writer. And, don't sugarcoat it. Please. I want to know how you really feel. I hope you like this story alot, I was browsing Partridge Family FanFictions and they were none about Danny. personally,Danny's my favorite, so I know if your like me you'll like this story. I'm starting to get boring, so just skip this message and read the story!

DANNY PARTRIDGE, PRIVATE EYE

"Mom?" Danny asked thoughtfully, struggling to carry a suitcase up the stairs to the Partridge Family bus. He dropped it at his feet and stared at his mother intensely. His pale, freckled face was a picture of all seriousness and his eyebrows furrowed together. "Tell me the truth. Is there something going on we don't know about?"

Shirley bit her lip to resist the urge to burst into laughter. "That you…don't. …know about." She strived to keep a straight face.

Danny nodded, his red curls bobbing up in down. "Yeah. You've just been acting- you know- kind of weird these past few days."

Shirley's eyebrows arched. "Really? Why would you say that?"

Danny shrugged. "I don't know. All our recent dinners have been burnt. You don't check under my bed for dust bunnies anymore. Or, maybe the fact that you're spending lots of time moping around the house, you stare into space a lot, and you seem- I don't know-preoccupied." He shrugged again. "But hey, what do I know?"

Shirley tried to look nonchalant. "Oooh, I don't think that's all true." She protested. "There's nothing- well, _wrong _with me."

"But mom, I think there is. You haven't yelled at me in almost _a week_!" He patted her shoulder sadly. "I think you're losing your touch."

Shirley couldn't hold back any longer. She burst into an uncontrollable fit of laughter.

At first it was muffled, and then, finally she let it all out. Her sides ached and she gasped for air. The whole thing seemed so funny to her.

Danny's eyes widened. "Mom? MOM! I think you're delirious!" He pressed his hand on her forehead. "We need help, right away!"

Just then, Keith stepped outside the house. Behind him in a single file were Laurie, Chris and Tracy. Their arms were all free. They started up the walk towards the bus. Just a few paces behind them was Rueben, suitcases and junk blocking his face, bags slung over his arms, and a doll in the curve of his elbow. He hurried to catch up with the rest of the gang, but unfortunately, he lost his balance and his whole mountain of suitcases came crashing to the ground. He sat up on the concrete and groaned dizzily.

Tracy looked back. "Thank you for carrying my bags, Mr. Kincaid." She exclaimed admiringly. Chris laughed.

Keith headed onto the bus first. He did a double take. "What's with mom?"

Danny had no problem explaining hastily, his arms flailing about. "I honestly think she's having a breakdown." He put his right hand on his chest and heaved a sigh. "I always knew this day would come. I just didn't think it would be so soon."

Shirley finally lifted her head and controlled herself."Oh no, kids, it's not that. It's just- Danny thinks I'm sick!"

Danny gave her defiant look. "Well if your not sick what are you?"

Shirley grinned broadly.

"I'm in love."


	2. On The Road

"WHAT?" Danny gaped.

Shirley rolled her eyes. "You make it sound as if my falling in love is some great tragedy."

Danny stammered. "Well- it is a tragedy, for the lucky guy your crushing on. I mean, no offense, mom, but aren't you kind of _old_ to live such a glamerous love life?"

Shirley heaved a sigh. "First of all Danny, it is not just a _crush_, he likes me back. Secondly, I'm not all that old and I could hardly describe my life as glamorous."

Laurie smiled knowingly. "Mom's right. Your never to old to have a love life." She said matter-of-factly.

Danny snorted. "HA!"

Keith nudged him, playfully."What, you don' t think mom is sexy enough to attract men?"

Shirley joined in, pretending to be offended. She turned around to face the back seats of the bus. "Yes Danny,_ is _that what your trying to say? Because, pardon me if I say so, but I like to believe that men find me_ quite_ sexy."

Danny shrugged dubiously. "Well, that's true. I guess if you're related to me, that automatically makes you sexy."

It was Keith's turn to snort. "HA!"

Their argument ceased when Shirley turned the keys into the ignition and headed down the street. The colorful bus was on it's way to week-long tour in Los Angeles where they would perform at an extremely fancy theater for a talent show and stay at an extremely fancy hotel.

They hadn't driven yet ten yards when the bus skidded to a halt, turned a perfect U-turn and pulled back up to the house. "We forgot our luggage!" Shirley explained in disbelief.

Sure enough, Reuben was standing outside on the sidewalk, waiting for them. Having retrieved the fallen suitcases, his hands were now totally full, and he was waving Tracy's rag doll around, frantically trying to get their attention. His flushed face and bulging eyes made the whole thing pretty funny.

Shirley hopped out of the bus and helped Reuben load the bus.

"All right then." Reuben said, when they were finished. "I'll meet you at the hotel in three days.

Shirley nodded, relieved. "Uh-huh."

"DON''T HURRY!" Danny called, his head sticking out of the bus window.

Reuben smiled wearily, yet happily. "Don't worry, Danny. "_Believe_ me, there's no hurry."

Once again, the Partridge Family loaded the bus. This time, Shirley was more cautious. "Everybody got everything they need to have, and did everything they need to do?" She asked finally.

"WAIT!" Tracy exclaimed, scurrying out of the bus and wrapping Reuben into a hug. "Bye Mr. Kincaid!" She grabbed her doll from Rueben and hurried back onto the bus.

As the colorful bus drove into the distance, you could hear the echoes of their "BYES!"They were finally on their way.

Usually, the activity on the Partridge Family bus varied from either the license plate game (or a game Chris and Tracy made up, where you have to sit in the back and wave at the people driving behind you through the back window. Whoever gets the most people to wave back wins) or singing along to the tunes they would be playing at their upcoming concert. Today, however, the conversation just kept coming back to Shirley's new boyfriend. It was understandable. It was, actually, the first boyfriend Shirley had ever had since the death of her husband. And, however much they hated to admit it, they were all a bit uncertain about the changes it would cause for them.

The typical conversation on the bus that day went like this:

Shirley: Well, kids, I hope you'll take this as good news.

Kids: What?

Shirley: Well you know my friend-

Danny: You mean your _boy_friend.

Shirley (sternly) is in L.A as well. And the talent show- He's in it! In fact, our acts are right next to each other's!

Keith: So we'll meet him?

Shirley: I'd really like you all too. He's an old high school sweetheart of mine. We've just started to meet each last month. I think you'll _all_ like him. He really is a _very _nice man.

Danny (sarcastically) I'm sure.

Laurie: Mom, I think it's great your finally reconnecting with some men out there.

Shirley: Well, I'm glad to hear that Laurie.

Danny: I don't think it's any good at all.

Shirley: Danny! What is it with you today?

Laurie: Yeah, Danny. What's wrong with Mom dating men?

Keith: Yeah, the only real reason you'd have to worry is if she _wasn't_ dating men!

(silence)

Keith: (offended) Well I thought that was funny.

Laurie: Mom, I'm worried.

Shirley: About what?

Laurie:Well about your boyfriend being in the same hotel as you and all. I mean, let's not rush things.

Shirley: I'm sure I can handle it on my own, Laurie thank you very much. Besides, he's not in the same hotel as me. He's in another one nearby.

Tracy: Does your boyfriend have a name?

Shirley: Yes he does, it's Walter.

Danny: (sarcastically) I'll write that down.

Chris: Mom, can you promise me something?

Shirley: Depends on what it is.

Chris: Can you promise not to kiss your boyfriend in front of me?

Shirley: Chris, we're not _kissing_ each other! just really enjoy each other's company.

Danny: Pretty soon they will be you know what that means...

That was when Shirley just snapped. "_Danny! _I've had _enough!_ The next gas station we see we are pulling over and I'm going to have a talk with you! This has _got to stop!"_

Danny gulped.


	3. The Trouble With Danny

DISCLAIMER: The Partridge Family is not mine.

Note: Hi again. I'm really proud of this story, so I hope you like it. Thanks for reading! And remember, pleeeeeeease reveiw! Thanks again.

DANNY PARTRIDGE, PRIVATE EYE

Shirley pulled over as they reached a gas station. "Wow." She muttered, under her breath. "36 cents a gallon! Prices are getting steep these days." She paused. "I just can't _take_ it any more."

"The prices?" Laurie asked.

"No," Shirley replied coolly. "Danny."

Keith slapped his knee and started a fit of historical laughter. Danny gave him a loathsome look.

"Danny, I _have_ to have a talk to you." Shirley said sternly.

"But mom." Danny protested in a wounded voice. "In front of _Keith?_ Come on, that's humiliating!"

Shirley nodded, and grabbed him by the wrist, practically dragging him out of the bus. "Then we'll just have to talk outside." She said through gritted teeth. The two figures stood outside the bus, arguing. Any one watching would have seen feet stamp, arms flailing, and hands on hips. And, almost any innocent bystander would agree, it was just a matter of time before the words, "YOUR GROUNDED!" would be uttered and the tears would start.

But they didn't know Danny.

"Look." Shirley said, trying unsuccessfully to control her anger. "You've been acting like a- a-" She waved her arms, looking for the words.

"RAT FINK!" Keith supplied through the bus's open window. Turning around, they could see four smirking faces giggling behind their hands.

Shirley nodded. "Yes! That's it! A rat fink, ever since I mentioned my boyfriend."

Danny looked at her. "I thought you didn't like it when we use the word rat fink." He murmured quietly, hanging his head.

"That's not the_ point_. All I want to know is _ why. _Why this sudden- transformation into a rat fink? This bitterness?"

"I'm sorry mom." Danny confessed earnestly. "Really. I'll stop sulking. I promise."

Shirley's head tilted.

Danny rushed on. "I really do!" He continued, melodramatically,

"I give you my word." He nodded his red head reassuringly. His eyes twinkled, and he added frankly, "In fact, it's a 100 percent guarantee! Would you like some collateral for that,ma'm? I could sign a contract if you want." He whipped a pen out of his shirt pocket.

Shirley's face broke out into a warm smile. "Thank you, Danny. But I don't want you to apologize. I want you to tell me _why _you were acting like that. I mean, there must be a reason. You don't normally act like a-"

Danny smiled shamefacedly. "Ratfink."

Shirley crossed her arms and stood back. "_What's_ the matter?"

Danny stuffed his hands in his pockets and began to whistle. He stared into space before saying casually, "Oh ,nothing."

His eyes met hers. Danny squinted, finally giving in."It has to do with your boyfriend."

Shirley gasped, and her hands flew to her cheeks, her eyes dramatically wide. "Really?"

Danny nodded sincerely. "Yes. As hard it is to believe, it's true. All of this was because of your boyfriend."

Shirley put her hands on her hips. "Noooo."

Danny laid his hand on her shoulder. "I know you have a hard time thinking of a reason why _I_, Danny Partridge, model son and whiz kid, could have a reason to hate your boyfriend. _Especially _without even giving him a chance, without even meeting him, with_out _ being even within a mile distance of him. But it's the sad truth. Everybody's a judge these days, including me."

Shirley's eyes widened in annoyance. She sucked in her breath and said, "Please, Danny, tell me.I'm asking you this because I want to _help _you. I want to know your innermost dreams and desires. I want to understand _what_ this is all about. I want to_ understand _you."

Danny shook his head, his usual impish grin returning to his face. "Mom, there's alot of things you don't understand about me. And, you never will." He shrugged.

Shirley nodded. "Knowing you, I think that's very true. I give up. All is forgiven." She gave him a playful shove. " Back in the bus."

Danny marched up the stairs and used the seats as a crutch to swing himself to the back seat. He was about to take a seat when he noticed the peculiar looks of his brothers and sisters. Their eyes followed him.

"What?" He demanded to know. The eyes didn't move off of didn't even blink. He laughed. "WHAT?"

"What's the reason?" Laurie asked.

Danny shooed them away with his hands. "You'll never know_._"

"How come is it a secret?" Tracy asked, her smile growing wider.

Chris joined in. "If it is I want to know!"

Danny was clearly enjoying having a piece of information that nobody knew, and he was going to keep it that way. He just kicked up his feet, crossed his arms and tucked his arms behind his head. He didn't say a word. He didn't have to. His triumphant grin said it all.

The bus started and they were on their way. For about ten minutes, it was dead silent, a rare event for the kids Finally someone broke the eerie quiet. If you guessed Danny, you were right.

"This quiet thing is giving me the creeps! Whatsa matter with everybody?" He turned to Keith for an explanation.

Keith squinted at him, as if he was seeing Danny in a whole new light.

"What _is _the reason you were acting like a rat fink?"


	4. Quarters, and Nickels and Dimes Oh My

DISCLAIMER: Do I even have to say it. No, I STILL don't own the Partridge Family.

**_IMPORTANT:_** I've changed chapter two a little. If you don't want to read it again, you don't have to, all that's been changed is that Shirley's boyfriend is_ not_ staying at the same hotel as them. You'll see why as the story goes on.

Note: I've gotten this far without reviews. I feel like a failure. I'm one of those people who gets excited about even the tiniest reviews, so please, just leave a short tiny puny review if you read this story. If you want, be mean you can. Since you've probably all been down this path before, you may know how I feel. I try to review every story possible myself.P.S Thanks to my readers! (Actually I'm not really sure if anyone is reading this story, but if you've gotten this far, THANK YOU! And if you review, well, let's just say GOD BLESS YOU!

DANNY PARTRIDGE, PRIVATE EYE

It was only a matter a time after that before they reached the hotel. It was the fanciest place they had ever seen, and big enough to be a mansion. It was surrounded by healthy, green potted plants and the sidewalk around it was tiled with marble. In the middle was the most beautiful fountain you could imagine: the clear, pure water dribbled down from the golden statue's basket and into the deep fountain. The whoosh whoosh sound of the fountain was luring, and droplets of water misted their faces as they passed it. The fountain itself was the size of a small pool, and deep too. On it hung a gold plate that said in engraved cursive letters: DO NOT SWIM.

They loaded out of the bus and onto the fancy marble driveway. "O-ooh." Laurie contentedly. "I could get used to this." Her shoes click-clacked on the tiles beneath her as she stepped off the bus and onto the ground.

Tracy and Chris came behind her. Their play suits and messy hair stood out from the dignified, rich-looking people who lingered outside. Lovers sat together on benches outside in the courtyard, and bell boys were busy escorting their elegant guests inside. Every single one of those elegant people turned their noses up at Chris and Tracy. Of course, they didn't notice. They were too busy scrambling out of the bus and jumping around.

"Everybody here is _rich." _Chris announced in aw.

"That must mean we are too." Tracy's big hazel eyes took everything in.

Laurie giggled. "Not quite. But we can pretend." She resumed a dignified composure and held out her hand as if waiting for a kiss. "Oh dah-ling." She said in possibly the worst British accent known to man. "Isn't this so dah-ling, dah-ling?"

Chris and Tracy giggled.

As Danny passed her, he did the cuckoo sign. "All this rich air must be going to her head." He and Keith shared a look that could only be described as one that said, _Girls! _and walked on to the fountain.

Danny peered into the deep, deep must have been at least six or seven feet. Beneath it all , he could see the money: dimes, pennies, nickels, and best of all quarters.

"Ah, what a glorious sight."

Keith turned. He had been busy staring at the statue of a naked woman on top of the fountain.

"You bet she is." He said dreamily, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

Danny turned to the statue, disgusted. "Not her!"

Keith smirked. "Oh?"

"The money, dum-dum!"

Keith groaned. "Oh."

Danny scooted up on the fountains ridge. The money was just out of reach. He scooted closer, closer, his greedy arms just inches away from being able to grab the money. Closer, closer, and- SPLASH!

* * *

Keith turned, startled to where Danny had just been. He bit his lip but kept himself from bursting into hysterics. He did however, roll his eyes.

Danny was dramatically bobbing his head up and down, his arms flailing and splashing to keep himself afloat. His red hair had turned stringy and a rusty brown from the exposure to water, his shirt was sticking to to him, and his eyes were red and puffy against his pale white skin. "Help! Help!" He gasped for air and clutched his throat.

Keith was unsure to whether or not Danny was really drowning, but the small crowd that had gathered round (all in expensive mink coats, and three-piece suits) were certainly not willing to jump in that water themselves. He quickly scanned the crowd for his mother, but she was not to be found.

So he did the only thnig there was to do: He ripped off his shirt, unbuckled his belt and threw his pants aside. Bracing himself for the impact, he strided inside the fountain in only his shorts. He shivered and his teeth started actually chattering. It was freezing! He waded towards the middle, where Danny had just went down. Bad idea: the fountain water squirted directly into his eye. He winced and kept going. He grabbed the surface and felt the floor with his toes: no luck. Danny was nowhere to be found. Ducking underwater, he forced his eyes to open but saw nothing. He popped back up and gasped for air.

He had never been the athletic type, so it occurred to him how funny he must look: a practically grown man, fighting against the not- existing currant of a fountain. Not to mention that he was in his underwear. Around him, he heard gasps and laughter.

Did one of those laughs sound familar? He couldn't tell. He finally looked around at the even bigger crowd surrounding him. Oh, there was Laurie, hysterically laughing, and Chris and Tracy pointing. His mother too, seemed to be holding back giggles. He gritted his teeth and shook the wet droplets out of his hair. Why were they laughing when Danny had possibly drowned and he was about too?

Then he looked at the other side of the fountain: There was Danny, calmly stepping out of the fountain, fully clothed and well. A bell boy handed him a fluffy towel and Danny wrapped it around himself.

Keith gritted his teeth so hard he almost broke his jaw. That Danny! He hadn't been drowning at all! Fully forgetting he was wearing only underpants, he leaped out of the fountain and got ready to throw a punch at Danny. A bell boy caught his punch and he was so embarrassingly weak he couldn't resist it.

In the distance, he saw Danny, his sides shaking with laughter as he ran for his life, leaving a trail of little wet footprints behind him. Keith dropped his arm wearily and gave in. He allowed the bellboy to wrap him in a pink fluffy towel and stampeded off.

* * *

Shirley sighed, and began to follow them. "Laurie, you watch Chris and Tracy. I've got to talk to Danny."

Laurie smiled slyly, muffling a giggle behind her hand. "Sure mom."

Had Shirley not found the whole thing funny, she would have been as mad as Keith. Fortunately, she had a sense of humor. Nonetheless, she couldn't help yelling as she spotted Danny hiding behind a tall green plant. "DANNY!" She cried angrily.

Danny peeked out. "Mom, please don't call attention to me. I'm hiding from Keith." He whispered, his eyes darting around. "If he sees me, he'll kill me."

Just then, Keith's voice echoed through the courtyard. "WHERE IS DANNY? IF I SEE HIM, I'LL KILL HIM!"

"See?" Danny whimpered. "My life is in danger. Quick! Duck down! Try to blend in with the tree. He's coming!"

Shirley shook her head. "If you think I'm going to protect you- after what you did- well, your very wrong!"

Danny gulped.

"KEITH!" She screeched, beckoning him to come closer. "I got Danny right here."

Keith came striding over, his bare, long legs getting faster with every step. His arms were straight to his sides. He got his arm ready for a punch, but just as he would have hit Danny, Shirley got in the way. "Keith are you okay?"

"Am I okay? " He babbled. "Am I okay? I just got nearly drowned to save that rotten brother of mine and she asks me if I'm okay? Do I _look_ like I'm okay? I am not OK."

Danny shuffled closer. "I'm sorry Keith. I really was drowning."

Shirley raised an eyebrow. "Oh you were? Because it seems to me you are a very good swimmer. How'd you get in the fountain anyway?"

Danny looked down. "I fell in."

Keith exploded. "Tell her why you fell in. Tell her how come!" He took a step forward and pointed a trembling finger at his brother. "This miser was trying to collect coins!"

Shirley stared at Danny. "And you couldn't just get out?"

Danny tried to explain. "No. Something was holding me down."

Shirley frowned. "And what was that?"

Danny sheepishly pulled his pockets inside out. Money came tumbling out. About two pounds of money had been in Danny's pockets.

Shirley exploded. "You did all this-" She waved her hands around."for about three dollars worth of pennies! You put your life in danger, Keith's life in danger and our being able to stay at this hotel in danger!"

Keith shifted on his toes and looked down in mock humbleness."Yes, mom, after all, if he had been_ really _drowning," (at this point Keith gave Danny a dirty look) "I would have been his hero."

Shirley continued, ignoring him. "I hope you know your going to be punished. SEVERELY."

Danny faced her. "Look mom, I appreciate your trying to educate me about the wrongs I committed, but could you tell me what's the punishment and get it over with?" He puffed out his chest. "I can take it."

Shirley fretted. "I'll think of something."

Keith's grin was slowly but surely reappearing on his face. "Oh, mom, I can think of ALOT of things...if you need any help."

"First things first. " Shirley said sternly. "I want you to_ march _up to the owners of this hotel and _personally _apologize."

Danny marched.

As he reached the entrance to the hotel, he was seized by two guards. One grabbed his left arm and one grabbed his right, holding Danny a few inches up into the air, his soggy sneakers dangling inches from the ground. One man reached for his walkie talkie. "We need back-up." He muttered into it.

Needless to say, they were kicked out.

Later-

"What are we going to do, Mom?" Laurie asked. "I mean,where will we stay?"

Shirley smiled happily. "Oh, I know a place we can go."

"You do?" Danny exclaimed happily. His guilt trip had began to kick in and he felt responsible for getting them kicked out of the hotel. It wasn't helping that he was grounded for two weeks and Keith was refusing to talk to him.

"Oh yes." Shirley smiled slyly. "We're going to stay at my boyfriend's hotel."


	5. Friendly Advice

DISCLAIMER: I don't own the Partridge Family, thank you have a nice day.

NOTE: REVEIWS PLEASE! ANY IDEAS ARE WELCOME!

DANNY PARTRIDGE, PRIVATE EYE

"Well, here we are." Shirley proclaimed cheerfully, pulling in front of a hotel. It was far from the fancy hotel they had been to before, but it would do. In fact, they would feel more at ease at a place like this anyhow. Their psychedelic bus hadn't exactly fit in at the other hotel, and neither had they, apparently.

Keith shifted his position, his wet bell- bottoms sticking to the seat."Maybe we can stay here for more than fifteen minutes." He said through gritted many bus rides went by without Danny and Keith arguing, but somehow the silence was worse. Much worse.

Danny held his red head high. "I am going to ignore that, but keep in mind, Keith, you are slowly working your way out of my heart."

Keith shot him a look of brotherly disgust.

"Now kids," Shirley said sternly, "That's enough." The wheels on the bus skidded to a halt and the roar of the bus's engine died out."Okay, everybody out, we're here. "

The kids were practically leaking out from the windows, eager to escape. Laurie went first, walking sideways to make her way through the aisles with her large suitcase. "Mom." She grunted. "Don't you think it would just be easier to leave our luggage in here? I mean, Danny will probably get us kicked out within twenty minutes anyway."

Danny scowled.

Tracy scooted her way out of the bus. "Yeah." She announced bitterly, turning to Danny. She scrunched up her tiny little freckled nose and blew her wispy strawberry blond bangs out of her face. "Now we don't get to be rich anymore. "

"Thanks, _Danny._" Chris proclaimed sarcastically.

Danny's scowl deepened. "How come I have to be the villain in this?" He asked grumpily. "My philosophy is, 'When in doubt, blame Keith.'"

Shirley showed a hint of a smile. "Oh, don't worry about it." She said, her attitude much improved from the incident at the hotel. She stared into space, past Danny. "I believe it may have worked out for the best."

Danny grinned and using the seat as a crutch, swung himself out of the aisle and hurried down the steps to join his siblings, who were impatiently waiting by the door. Tracy was sitting on her suitcase with her arms crossed.

"Okay everybody let's move it. " Shirley said, shooing them inside the hotel. They paraded in, heads high.

Keith had stuffed his wet, stringy hair under a baseball cap and had held his head down, undercover. "Mom, my _hair."_ He said in a low voice, looking frantically around. "We can't let anyone see me like this."

Shirley turned to him. "Keith, calm down. We'll be near a brush or comb in just a matter of minutes, all right?" She stepped forward to the front desk.

"Hello, I'm looking for a certain-" Shirley was interrupted by a tug on her skirt. She looked down. Looking up at her humbly was a short, pudgy redhead. "Danny!" She hissed. "What is it now?"

She turned to the desk clerk for a moment. "Pardon me for a moment please." She sucked in her breath. "What _i__s_ it, Danny?"

Danny stared seriously into her blue eyes. "Mom." He said reasonably. "You don't just ask for him by the clerk."

Shirley tittered. "And why not?"

Danny rolled his eyes and talked the way one would to a three-year old. "_Because." _He said, exasperated. "It will make him think your chasing him. Stalking him. You know, that your so crazy about him that your willing to go anywhere for him." Danny hesitated, pausing to see his mother's reaction.

She didn't flinch. And once he get that idea-" Danny dropped his voice and his eyes darted around the hotel lobby- "He'll-"

Shirley interrupted. "Danny, that's enough."

Laurie, who had been listening intently to their conversation, stepped forward. "Actually mom-" She said, tilting her head. "He's kind of right. You want to be cool with him. Play hard to get."

Shirley raised an eyebrow curiously. Laurie's advice in men was more worth regarding. "But it is entirely an accident that we came to be here. And I think I'm pretty cool already, don't you?"

Chris nodded reluctantly. "For a mom."

Shirley tousled his hair. "All right, so what should I do?"

"Well." Laurie said. "Well, you want_ him _to be the one falling for you. So what you do is accidentally meet in the lobby or hallway, or call him and ask him where he's staying and act surprised when he says you're staying at the same hotel. If he thinks he's already made you fall in love with him, he'll feel too comfortable, see what I mean?"

Shirley grunted uneasily. "It sounds to me something like a teenage soap opera."

"Oh trust me mom." Laurie assured her, patting her shoulder. "It works every time."

Shirley laughed. "How do you know these things?"

Tracy piped up. "Woman's intuition. All woman have it. "

Danny smirked and puffed out his chest heroically. "See mom, I told you! I'm a man. I should know all about it!"

At the thought of Danny being a man, Keith literally snorted.

"Well how about we ask San Pueblo's most eligible bachelor about it, since he's obviously such an expert." Danny retorted.

Keith gave a mock sigh. "Oh why do I have to be so darned attractive?"

Then he puffed out his chest and crossed his arms. "It's not my fault woman find me irresistible. After all, I am extremely charming."

" Oh, and _dreamy." _Laurie said in a high-pitched voice, imitating one of Keith's many girlfriends.. "Keith's my_ Teddy bear!_"

Keith stiffened. "How'd _you_ find out about that?"

Laurie avoided answering his question. "Come on Keith, it's funny and you know it." Then she brightened. "Speaking of funny, I should take a picture of Keith before the sun dries him off. Where's my camera?"

Keith jumped at her. "That doesn't leave this room!"

Shirley told Laurie it was in the suitcase. Then she continued, "Moving back to my boyfriend, I do think we should tell him I'm here, but I'll wait until tomorrow. I'm exhausted anyway."

She gestured towards Tracy, who was leaning against her suitcase fast asleep, Raggedy Anne tucked in her arms. " I think we all are."

She returned to the now-impatient desk clerk. It was apparent he had been listening to their conversation. He leaned forward, his face inches away from Shirley's. "Advice from a fellow to a-" He looked Shirley up and down- "_Pretty_ lady like you, I'd go with the kid's idea."

Shirley stared angrily at him. "If you were listening that far into our conversation sir, you must know that I'm already_ taken." _

Now she stood up straighter. "I'd like a room please."

Once the arrangements were made, they jammed into the elevator and headed into their room.

Laurie evacuated immediately to the showers, while Keith went to blow-dry his hair. Chris settled into a comfy chair and read a comic book, Tracy was fast asleep, and Shirley was sitting on the bed staring into space, a gesture that annoyed Danny.

It had been a long day, but Danny was restless. He almost always was. Mom staring into space like that was what bothered him. Very much. It was obvious that she had fallen head- over- heels for a guy she barely even knew!

"Danny, I've known him since high school." Shirley corrected him. Danny jumped. He hadn't even been speaking out loud!

"I can see that your obviously concerned about my well-being. But Danny, I want to ask you to leave my love life alone. Your only ten years old and I'm an adult. Why do you assume that I don't know what I'm doing?"Shirley was getting angrier.

"Well sure mom, you musta read _some_ stuff about love. So you have a faint idea of what your doing. But mom, what if you're wrong? What if your not really in love with him?"

He paused for a moment to see his mother's face, then cowered behind his magazine.

Shirley frowned. "Danny this is strictly an adult relationship and you are going to stay out. You'll meet him tomorrow. Maybe then you'll see what a nice man he is."

She walked away.

_Maybe. _Danny thought. _But I doubt it. _


	6. A Call With Mr Kincaid

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT own the Partridge Family!

NOTE: I hope you like this chapter! One of my favorite chapters so far, but that's just me :)As you all are aware, I LOOOOOOOVE reveiws!

DANNY PARTRIDGE, PRIVATE EYE

_The details were distant and clouded, as if walking in somebody else's memory, and slowly but surely the details shifted and sharpened into focus : The march of the wedding song began. The music echoed in Danny's ears, a warping its self into a twisted, dark version of the familiar wedding tune._

_His eyes wandered, unsure of what to do next. And his eyes finally came upon two figures, one he recognized as his mother, dressed beautifully in white, her dress glittering under the church lights and tailing behind her. Next to her was somebody dark, unfamilar, not entirely clear. THE GROOM. Slowly and almost robotically, they walked up the aisle, the click- clack of her high heels sounding monotonous on the tiled church floors. They were getting closer...closer...closer to the place where they would be legally and officially wed._

_Danny gulped, a lump stuck in his throat, unsure of what to do. Then there was a hiss from a nearby pew. It was Laurie. "GO!" She whispered, shoving him forward._

_"What the-" Danny didn't continue his sentence._

_Keith, on the other end of the pew tapped him. "You're the flower girl." He flashed a evil grin that took up his entire face._

_Danny looked down frantically, and saw that he was wearing a pink, flowered dress with puffed sleeves, and white high heel shoes. He reached for his hair, atop his head was a ring of flowers and ribbons, his hair was curled. He broke into a cold sweat and his mouth dropped open. "NOOOOOO!" he screeched._

"No...NO...NOOOOO!"

_At the sound of Danny's scream, his mother and the groom, having just reached the front of the church, whirled around. To Danny's utter dismay, the groom was revealed to be...REUBEN!_

"No...no..." Danny mumbled, tossing and turning on his mattress, his red hair tousled and his pajamas sticking to his cold skin from sweat. "Noo..."

He bolted up in his bed and looked down at himself, bracing himself to see a pink dress. He grinned in disbelief at the sight of his plain old striped pajamas. "YAY!" He yelped, leaping up and bouncing on his mattress in celebration.

On the bed across from his, Laurie groaned. "Danny..." she muttered sleepily. "You're going to wake up the whole hotel..."

"Sorry Laurie." He whispered, struggling to control himself.

When Danny was sure she was asleep once more, he tiptoed to the desk where the hotel phone was. "Hello?" He whispered into the phone. "Yes. Operater? I'd like the number for a Mr. Reuben Kincaid..."

* * *

Meanwhile, Rueben lay asleep peacefully in his bed.

R-I-I-N-G!

He didn't move. "Go away..." Rueben muttered, smooshing his head in his pillow.

R-I-I-I-N-G!

"Whatever it is I don't want it!" Rueben covered his ears with his pillow.

R-I-I-I-I-I-N-G!" On the third ring, Rueben bolted awake in his bed and stormed to the telpehone.

"HELLO!" He yelled into the telephone, holding it at least a foot away from his head.

There was a hesitation. Then a tiny voice whispered..."Where were you exactly two minutes ago?"

Rueben's eyes bugged out. "WHAT?"

"Where were you exactly..."

Rueben interrupted. "I heard what you said, but for a second I thought it was..." He laughed at his own stupidty. "Danny Partridge!"

There was silence on the other end.

Reuben stared at the phone in disbelief. "Don't tell me it_ is _Danny Partridge."

"Danny Partridge, at your service sir." A hoarse voice on the other end responded. "Just checking in. All is well." There was a click.

Reuben stumbled sleepily to his bed and collapsed. He lay at his bed and stared at the ceiling for a moment. Then he slowly lifted himself up. "I wonder what he wanted."

It wasn't long before he found out.

R-I-I-N-G! Reuben flung his covers aside and stalked angrily to the telephone. "Hello." He said through gritted teeth.

"Mr. Kincaid..." Danny said slowly. "I hope I'm not interrupting anything."

"Oh, no, not at all." Rueben rushed on in mock cheerfullness.

"I just wanted to know, do you have any plans to marry my mother any time soon?"

Rueben stared at the phone in disbelief. "Not that I know of... why, does she have plans to marry me?"

"No. I just wanted to make sure. Carry on as usual sir." Danny hung up.

Rueben found himself unwilling to go back to bed. What was going on? He wondered. He shook his head. He couldn't force himself to try and get himself into Danny's mind.

Just as he found himself reaching to the phone and about to call the number of their hotel, the phone rang. Rueben jumped a mile and hit his knee on the desk. "Ow!" He said, holding his bruised shin in his arms.

"Hello." He muttered, holding the phone between his head and shoulder as he hopped on one foot.  
"Oh Danny, wasn't expecting to hear from you. What a surprise."

"Mr. Kincaid." Danny's voice was serious as usual. "This is no time for small talk."

Rueben frowned. "What other kind of talk could we have with a ten year old who's barely four feet tall?" He laughed lamely at his own joke.

The other end was silent. He could almost picture Danny shaking his head in disgust. "Mr. Kincaid, I just wanted to warn you that we might have some trouble."

"Oh?" Reuben faked interest.

"Yes. I just thought you should know. Mom's in love!"

"Uh-huh. You woke me up to tell me_ that?" _Rueben groaned, staring longingly at his bed. "Look kid. Shut up and get some sleep we'll talk about it tomorrow."

"Mr. Kincaid." Danny whined. "I strongly advise that we discuss this. Mom's in a serious relationship!"

Having no reaction from Reuben, Danny rushed on. "This could mean the end of the Partridge Family. If she gets married we'll have to change our last name and settle down and that'll be the end of our days in show business." The last words were said mournfully.

Rueben was about to hang up. Knowing Danny, it was probably a simple overreaction. "And Mr. Kincaid." Danny added. "You might lose your job."

That got Reuben going. "Look, how serious is this?"

"Very serious."

"Lose my job..." Rueben rambled. "I'll have move and find new business...no more income...I'll miss you kids... I really like you deep inside-"

"You DO?" Danny was shocked. "You've got to be kidding!"

Reuben snapped back on guard. "Have you met the fellow?" He asked warily.

"Well..." Danny's voice cracked. Just then their was static on the phone. Reuben clutched it to his head, desperate to keep the connection.

* * *

Danny smiled craftily as he crinkled a candy wrapper into the phone. "I'm...I'm losing the connection.' He lied through his teeth. "Be here...as soon as possible...SUNSET TOWERS HOTEL!...bye."

Danny slammed the receiver down. _He'll be here. _


	7. Getting Ready

_A/N OK, it's been a LONG time. I know, and I'm sorry about that. But I am still working on this story, I haven't given up on it even though it may have seemed like that since I haven't updated in forever. To make it up to you guys, here's a recap so that you don't have to re-read the whole story over again:_

_Shirley is acting strangely and after Danny confronts her, he is dismayed to find out that she is in love. He makes a big deal, although the other kids are fine with it. They are going on tour and end up having to stay at the same hotel as Shirley's boyfriend is. Danny is getting frantic, he doesn't like the way Shirley is acting all lovey dovey to some guy he doesn't even know. He calls Rueben up in the middle of the night and asks him to meet them at the hotel to sort the whole thing out._

_NOW, it's th the next morning, and the kids are all getting ready to meet Shirley's boyfriend._

"Ow!" Tracy squirmed uncomfortably,her hands holding tightly onto the bottom of the seat. She furrowed her brow and looked up in annoyance into her mother's all-seeing eye."Stop that."

Shirley was trying in vain to remove a lollipop, (or 'a sucker' as Tracy liked to call them) out of a sticky, tangled mass of Tracy's long straw-berry blond locks.

She sucked in her breath and let it out in exasperation. Then, as a last resort, she gave a final tug.

"How- on-EARTH-did-you-get a-LOLLIPOP-STUCK-in-your-HAIR?" Shirley demanded to know as she jerked the brush out of Tracy's matted hair. She wasn't going to risk getting the brush getting stuck in too.

Tracy squinted up at her. Then she looked accusingly at Danny. "Danny did it." She finally decided.

"Danny?" Shirley looked shocked at Tracy's little lie. "Now how can you blame Danny-"

"S'ok, mom. It seems to be the trend these days." Danny said in an overly depressed tone.

While the others were frantically preparing for the arrival of Shirley's boyfriend,Danny had spent the entire morning moping around in self-pity. After yesterday's talk with Shirley and with Keith still refusing to speak to him, he felt unwanted. Unneeded. In the past, he had always been in charge, or at least the idea-man of the group. Now, it seemed nobody cared and he didn't like the way that felt. Not to mention the fact that Shirley's boyfriend was coming here to meet them all, and Reuben was still nowhere to be found.

So now, squarely refusing to participate in the madness of preparing for the anticipated moment, Danny was sitting in the corner, watching the Partridge Family run around the hotel room like crazy. He figured he'd better look on the bright side of things- there was nothing he liked more than to watch his family (namely Keith) make fools of themselves. He settled down in the uncomfortable hotel love-seat and watched the show...

Shirley gave up with a sigh. "It's no use." She sighed mournfully. "We'll have to bring out the scissors."

Tracy's eyes got wide.

She lifted Tracy's bangs from her eyes. "As a matter of fact, we may as well go all the way with this trim. You haven't had a proper hair cut in quite some time."

The closer the scissors got, the farther away Tracy leaned in her seat, her eyes tracing the scissors every move.

"MOM!" Danny felt he had to interrupt. "If you keep waving those scissors around you're going to hurt somebody."

"I know what I'm doing." Shirley replied casually, getting ready to snip.

Chris raised his eyebrows. "I sure hope so."

Just then, Keith emerged from the bathroom with a towel around his waist, having just got out of the shower. He held his head back and shook the shaggy mane of brown hair that the girl's loved to run their hands through, sending water droplets around the room. He grinned and looked up.

"Hey mom-"

He looked down at the scissors she held in her hand. "What are you going to do with those?" He demanded.

"I'm giving Tracy a haircut." Shirley said simply.

Keith caught her arm and held it in mid- air just seconds before the scissors snipped off a precious lock of Tracy's hair. "Don't!"

Shirley looked shocked. "Why not?"

Laurie tried the gentle approach. "Well, mom, what Keith is trying to say is...you may not just be cut out to be a hair stylist." She grinned to herself at her own private pun, but the joke flew right over Keith's head.

Danny rolled his eyes. "Mom, what their both trying to say is you're a rotten barber."

"I think I can do this. It's just a_ trim, _calm _down._"

Keith tried to reason with her. "Mom, remember sixth grade when you used to cut my hair all the time?" The memory seemed to be painful for him. He exhaled sadly, and muttered to himself, "My hair hasn't been the same since."

Danny jumped at the mention of Keith's little haircut. Now this might be something to add to the Partridge Family history...and the possibilities this tid-bit of information had for black mail were worth considering.

Laurie snorted behind her hand. "You looked _adorable _as a baldie!" She giggled.

"Veeee-ry funny. You think you're really cute, don't ya Laurie." Keith was disgusted.

"I'm not as cute as you looked bald." She smiled sweetly.

Chris and Tracy turned to each other and shared an amused look.

"I wanna see Keith bald." Chris announced.

"I don't." Tracy replied matter-of-factly. "Keith's an egghead."

Danny crossed his arms. "Can't argue with you there." He leaned over to Tracy and whispered in her ear. "Escape while you can!" He hissed.

Shirley shot him a look.

He straightened at once. "_I_ didn't say anything." He lied innocently.

Shirley only sighed. "Look, my boyfriend will be here any moment now. You'll have to get yourselves ready because I need to cut this lollipop _out _of Tracy's hair. Now, in ten minutes I expectg you all to be properly groomed, dressed, clean and ready to meet my boy-"

She happened to glance at Danny and corrected herself. "My friend. Do I make myself clear?"

Her voice was so stern that nobody dared argue, although Chris couldn't help adding in, "Yes sir."

"Now, GO!" She barked.

The moment the family sprung into action, there was a knock on the door.

"It's probably room service with my hamburger." Chris commented.

"I'll get it I'll get it!" Tracy flung herself out of the chair and headed straight to the door.

"Oh no you _won't. _" Shirley said through gritted teeth as she plopped Tracy right back into her seat. "Oh-uh-Laurie, will you get that?"

Because Laurie was in the shower, Danny brought himself over to the door, dragging along a chair. He scooted it up to the door and peered through the peephole. "Is this room service with Chris's hamburger?" He demanded to know.

A strained voice interrupted. "It's Rueben Kincaid."

_Well there it is. Not much, but more coming. Hope you guys enjoyed it._


	8. A Unexpected Visitor

**A/N: Since it's Summer now, I'll probably be updating alot more, OK? It's been awhile, so here's where we left off:**

_The moment the family sprung into action, there was a knock on the door._

_"It's probably room service with my hamburger." Chris commented._

_"I'll get it I'll get it!"Tracyflung herself out of the chair and headed straight to the door._

_"Oh no you won't. " Shirley said through gritted teeth as she ploppedTracy right back into her seat. "Oh-uh-Laurie, will you get that?"_

_Because Laurie was in the shower, Danny brought himself over to the door, dragging along a chair. He scooted it up to the door and peered through the peephole. "Is this room service with Chris's hamburger?" He demanded to know._

_A strained voice interrupted. "It's Rueben Kincaid."_

**OK, SO HERE'S THE NEW CHAPTER NOW, REVEIWS PLEASE!**

Danny broke out into a wide grin. "Say no more." He unlatched the hook to the door, and opened the door a crack. "Come in." He ordered in a hoarse whisper.

"Why are we whispering?" Rueben asked, bringing his face close to Danny's.

"It's a secret."

"Are you gonna open the door any wider, or do you expect me to get through that crack?" Rueben indicated the door.

"I can't-" Danny was interrupted.

"Danny, who are you talking to?" Shirley demanded to know.

Danny slammed the door on Mr. Kincaid, accidentally trapping his hand between the door and the wall. "Ow…" Mr. Kincaid hissed, struggling to break his hand free. "If you'd just get off the door for a second….so I could get my hand out….ow…"

"Danny, I said, "Who are you talking to?"

"Oh- uh…." Danny eyed Rueben's hand and his eyes widened- "Nobody."

"All right, well when you're done talking to nobody will you please get dressed?"

"Sure, mom." Danny rolled his eyes and opened the door again, now that his mom wasn't looking. Rueben yanked his hand out and cradled it in his arms.

"Ow." Rueben stumbled in, muttering a few undistinguishable curses under his breath, still examining his hand.

"Danny. Please get dressed." Shirley repeated.

Danny hustled Rueben into the bathroom, shoving him in and slamming the door. "Stay right here. I'll be back." He announced.

He was only two steps away from the bathroom door when he heard an ear piercing shriek. "MOM! MOM!" Laurie dashed out of the bathroom covered in only a towel. "There's a strange man in the bathroom!"

Shirley dropped her scissors and rushed towards Laurie. "What are you talking about?" She demanded to know, in a worried tone.

Rueben emerged from the bathroom sheepishly.

"He's not that strange."Tracysaid, tilting her head to study him. "He looks kinda like Mr. Kincaid."

Shirley gasped and faced Rueben angrily. "RUEBEN WHAT ARE YOU-"

"It's- It's not what it looks like!" Rueben protested, averting his eyes from Laurie.

"What DOES it look like?" Chris piped up.

"It better not be-"

"It is- I mean it isn't." Rueben took a deep breath and smiled. "Why don't you ask Danny?"

"DANNY WHAT ARE YOU-"

"I'm getting dressed mom." Danny replied. "Just like you said."

"Let me rephrase that question: what was RUEBEN doing in the bathroom of our hotel room?"

"Oh, yeah, that." Danny said uncomfortably. He paused. "I didn't know Laurie was in there, mom-"

"Danny WHAT is Rueben doing here?"

"He's..he's um.." Danny looked over to Rueben for help. Of course, Rueben was never very for good advice. "He's standing."

"You KNOW what I mean."

Danny looked down at his feet, ashamed. "I kind of…asked him to come over." He said hesitantly.

"You _kind of_ asked him to come over or you DID?" Shirley demanded.

Laurie felt she had to interrupt. "Well, you know how much I hate to interrupt a good cat fight, but, well, I'm gonna go get dressed. See ya." She turned and headed back to the resumed the argument. "I had to call Rueben, mom." Danny explained. " I mean, you told me you're in love, right?"

Shirley nodded slowly, looking confused. "I don't understand."

"Well, you don't know anything about love, Mom! How do we know you're prepared for a relationship? How do we know your boyfriend is nice? How do we know he's not a…..rat fink or something?"

Shirley's stern frown melted into a tiny smile. " Thanks for looking out for me, Danny, but I'll be okay. I think I know what I'm doing. And besides, Laurie's very good at advice."

Rueben laughed. "You're taking love advice from an eighth grader?"

"High school!" Laurie corrected from the bathroom.

"Still." Rueben pointed out.

"Yeah, well, when was the last time YOU had a date?" Laurie emerged from the bathroom, dressed in a blue knit dress, her arms crossed.

"Well…." Rueben considered.

"Exactly." She was triumphant.

Shirley started, and said, "You didn't tell me you broke up with Bonnie Klein….klein…."

"Shmit." Rueben said. "It was Bonnie Kleinshmit." He sighed and closed his eyes, as if recalling good memories. "At least right before we broke up we had great…" He eyed the children in the room, and Shirley's raised eyebrow. Keith and Laurie shared a knowing look.

"We had a great dinner." Rueben corrected himself.

"Did you have meatballs?"Tracy asked eagerly.

At that moment, there was a rap on the door, and Rueben was relieved.

"Oh." Shirley said, flustered. "I guess that's Walter. It's too late for you to leave now, Rueben. I supposed you can stay, but Danny, you are in a lot of trouble."

Danny nodded. "Figures." He muttered under his breath.

"Well, are you ready to meet my boyfriend?" Shirley asked as she reached the door and had her hand on the knob.

Her kids nodded encouragingly, besides Danny who mumbled an unenthusiastic "yeah"

"And you'll promise to be good?"

They all nodded.

"And you'll be polite-Oh Tracy, the lollipop is still stuck in your hair." Shirley sighed, rushing over to comb it out.

"Mom." Laurie giggled. "You're keeping Walter waiting. You know you're putting it off. Open the door already!"

"Hello Walter." She greeted him.

**A/N: OKAY, OKAY, I know this chapter was kind of short and not that good. It gets better though. I swear. That's it for now, talk to you the next chapter. **


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